You’re Welcome!

My mother had a medical procedure that required us to check into the hospital at 6:00 am. As such, I spent the better part of my morning walking around a hospital campus. While others brought blankets and books, I brought my refillable water bottle and a set of headphones. I am not the type of person who can sit in a hospital waiting room for three hours. After a walk around the entire outside of the hospital, I found myself walking through the hospital, first in search of food, and finally in search of a water refill station.

If you know anything about me, you know that I also spent a little bit of time in the hospital chapel. I am always and forever in search of a sanctuary, be it in the noisiness of nature or in the sterility of a medical facility. I will always look for a place where people go to meet with the Creator. This particular hospital had a Catholic name, so I expected a prominent crucifix, and a Holy Bible. I found both. I also found the lectionary reading for this week, and an African- American hymnal that I’d never seen before. (I immediately flipped through the pages to see what songs I would recognize.) I was a bit distraught that “Holy, Holy, Holy” was not on page 2, as it is in the hymnals I remember. But I soon found a few songs whose lyrics were as dear to me as some of the Psalms themselves, the melody of which I could pluck out on a piano…And while this was an amazing find…it was not the best thing I found today.

Off to the side of the chapel, was a little room called the prayer room. This room beckoned to me much more than the chapel, so much that I visited it first. What I found there was a place so holy, that I felt like I was trespassing when I set foot in the outer room. When I crossed the threshold, the first thing I noticed, were the two large washrooms where you could wash your feet. Then I saw the sign on the door that led to the inner room that asked that I please remove my shoes…I would have but I wasn’t wearing socks. (I did mention we had to be at the hospital at 6am, right?) So I stood in the doorway, entering only with my eyes, making sure my shod feet never set foot on this holy ground. There was no altar, just a wooden partition, where maybe a prayer leader or speaker would be. I saw prayer rugs and cushions in a corner, and I knew immediately that while the space was clearly marked with a sign that said “All are Welcome,” that the space was not intended for me.

I wonder how many of our churches look like that to people who don’t look like, think like, worship like us. We hang out the signs to invite them in, but upon entering, they know immediately that the space is not for them. Heck. I’ve been to quite a few churches of my chosen denomination that made me feel like I didn’t belong. But if our churches truly are places where heaven and earth meet, then all should feel welcome when they enter our doors.

Can you worship in a place where you don’t feel welcome? I absolutely believe that you can. I have worshiped in places where it is absolutely forbidden (i.e. my job). My ancestors found holiness amongst people who doubted their humanity. I believe that if you seek God you will find God. But I also believe that many of our churches make God seem less accessible to some people.

I have no doubt that the Lord would have met me in that prayer room today. But I defaulted to what was more comfortable, so I spent a majority of the time in the Christian chapel. I marveled at the stained glass windows, and muttered a brief prayer of thanksgiving at the altar. But I feel like I missed an opportunity. I know that God exists in unfamiliar places, and maybe, just maybe, God wanted to meet me in a place I’ve never been before.

How many times in my life have I reverted to what was comfortable over what is calling to me? Lord, have mercy. How many times have I chosen what is familiar over what is fascinating? Lord, have mercy. Help me to make my spaces more inviting, and help me to accept the invitations that are truly meant for me. Help me not to stand in doorways peaking around corners, when you are inviting me into something deeper.

Amen.